ItS MeEeEe!

today was fine heh. saw a lot of seniors; was very very happy XD so fun to like walk around the school and see the green badges everywhere which is like yay (: i love our green badges(:

primary assembly was alright i guess haha we pulled through though we went sharp and rushed (urgh) but it was quite enthu and the choir seemed to be enjoying performing so i can say that it was not bad (: heh.

i love snchoir(:

happy teachers' day!

gnia

sunday night.
i am sleepy. BUT. there's chem test 2mr. there's chinese and emaths on tuesday. and i havent started studying. damn, i heard that the test was damn hard. i hope they changed the paper x) yeah right.
i finished making teachers' day presents! tchr james one damn nice, haha. :D x) heh.
i feel happy. oh well.
all weekends seem to slip by unnoticed.
which is a very very bad thing, sigh.

oh yes; HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAMKOH! :D hehe all the best in the following year yeah? (:

gnia

dont know why, but i am feeling very sing-y today! haha which is a good thing!
failed a math, just as i thought so. so smart; studying proving the whole damn night and couldnt answer the qn that came out. i am amused. oh well. geog wasnt as bad as i had imagined, probably a lot better than expected actually. not silly qns like name the processes of harvesting palm oil; whatever.

yes.

i am a bit disappointed lah. i mean, yesterday we totally screwed up lah. and i really didnt expect us to screw so bad. and the response is so slow.. sigh i dont know what to say :(

but its the weekend and cam's birthday's on sunday(:

gnia

i HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE the way she freaking teaches maths lah! she just thinks we know everything she say and keep saying so simple so simple then whatever whatever like i practically sit there and stone for the whole damn lesson. i cant do anything else, and i just cannot set my mind on maths, damn it. and she's moving so darn fast, that rad thing dont even know how it works, and now she's like two days into some new topic already. not only cannot catch up, she doesnt give us time to copy the formulas into our notebook or something cause she probably thinks that it is in the textbook so dont need to let us copy. this is like so wrong so now i'm just doing examples without saying what it is and stuff, like i'll have a million problems studying for eoys, what joy. thank god she's teaching some graph thingy histogram, whatever.

and there's that TRIGO test 2mr i dont wna fail (even though maths is not my favourite subject i still dont want to fail either) ): and there's geog on friday ): chem on monday ): chinese on tuesday ): what a happy life i lead, whee. then we'll probably get our pprs on some day nxt week and i'll probably be like gaping at those (insert your own word here, haha) marks and be like hrming then mom will then go what always use com and what talk and yah? obviously to her, she thinks i do not study just cause i dont tell her about the tests that we have gosh can you imagine if i tell her that i have like amaths 2mr geog on friday and what nots? then i'll already be that cooped up nut in my room, oh well. I WNA GO CZECH OK how can i confirm 2mr, wth ):):):):): as if i dont want to confirm that i want to go 2mr liddat can.

i know i should get going to study maths trigo
like, NOW.

gnia

I WNA GO CZECH REPUBLICCCCCC!!!!!!!!

but how can she lay such SUCH (insert your own word here) terms on me! ALL A2S for eoys??? the chances of me getting all A2s for eoys is like 1 over a million zeros ): and how can i confirm this by 2mr?! )))))))))): its practically impossible to get all A2s lah! and she keeps harping about the A-TWO part ): how how how??? like:

"but i really really need to go next year!"
"then get all A2s this year end lah!"

erps HOWWWW?????????? get all b3s already like ehehe can? every time i say she'll go about that A2 thing which is SO IRRITATING!!! and its like almost equal to a "no you cant go" HOWW i feel veryy saddddd ):):):
and she keeps going on over what amaths and whatever whatever whatever WAH LAO i feel IRRITATED its like every 15 minutes sigh sigh sigh i am just very sian.

why cant it be judged by the amount of effort i put in like er if its like that i'll not go online until chinese o lvls over and be some cooped up nut in my room and at least if i even fail then at least i put in effort and she see right! but NO! its not like that. so even if i coop myself up and study 24 hrs a day and i dont get A2 i'll still be unable to go RIGHT?

see? to the society now, efficiency is ALL they see. they want the RESULTS. only. if you're supposed to deliver goods from bishan to changi in like 15 mins obviously you must speed or you'll be late right? but hey! if you deliver the goods late you'll probably get a "good" scolding or even get sacked. but what if you sped along the highway and got booked by traffic police? your boss probably wouldnt care! cause all they see are RESULTS. if you like die along the way in a car accident then your boss will like oh i am like SO so sorry this had happened but hey! its over. the most i just employ a new employee right? ok not really but you should get what i am driving at.

anyway. i hope we'll get like free periods all day especially for MATHS so that we'll have 2hr15mins worth of free periods spreaded out before and after recess. which is like really nice HAHA like no english and maths today? then me dee jingliang were singing during english then i was making geog notes during maths yes; it was really nice. like, yay. it was so fun lah. i dont mind having such a fun time again.

piano lesson later haha nothing to practice! yet. ><

sleepy. but i guess i'll go write my geog notes.

gnia

here in my heart - plus one

Wherever you are tonight girl
I'll see you in my dreams
Wherever I go tomorrow
You'll be here next to me

And though we are a world apart
I know you'll never be that far

'Cause here in my heart
There's a picture of us
Together forever
Unfaded and unbroken
Wherever you are
Your love covers me
Forever more you'll be
Here in my heart

Whenever I miss you so much
It's more than I can bear
I won't cry, I'll just close my eyes
And know you'll be there

Your kiss and your touch
I'll never forget
'Cause you're as close
As my very next breath

'Cause here in my heart
There's a picture of us
Together forever
Unfaded and unbroken
Wherever you are
Your love covers me
Forever more you'll be
Here in my heart

And though we are a world apart
I know you'll never be that far

'Cause here in my heart
There's a picture of us
Together forever
Unfaded and unbroken
Wherever you are
Your love covers me
Forever more you'll be
Here in my heart

----------------------------------------

came across it as an accident today when i was going through the westlife cd.. heard this song for the first time, yet i found it really familiar. it seemed like the typical song that i would have written like last year or something, its simple and sweet and the style is very.. simple. and the way the lyrics are written.. it just reminds me of myself last time lah.. all i wana say that.. this song's for you ann(: love you loads; i'll always be here ok?

anyway finally could access this page but its only half loaded no font change or anything yeah. just have those basic buttons.

this weekend.. wasted yet not really. was in this really reflective state and got a lot of thoughts and stuff.. so im in this not happy not sad mood. a very weird yet calm state..

i would like to blog about a million more things but it is late and i think i shall go to sleep; to think i woke up at 7 am today.

if i dont need to study (NOT not going school) then i think my life would be perfect cause then i wouldnt have geog and amaths test nagging at me at the back of my mind. but hey! i dont really care oh well. anyway;
music's one of the best things i have in life that i am really really grateful to have

gnia

oh well just didnt feel like doing anything. ):
[Step by step, heart to heart, left right left We all fall down like toy soldiers Bit by bit torn apart We never win But the battle wages on for toy soldiers] - eminem - like toy soldiers
duno.. but think about it. dont you think that's kinda sad?

anyway. i am sleepy.

[First we came here to set this party off right Let's bounce tonight And if they don't let us in through the front We'll come through the side]- eminem - encore
duno why but i find that a bit funny XD ok erm never mind x)

i've been feeling all singy these few days haha i love amarillis! duno why haha but it just sounds nice and decent (; it sounds very calm and yah our chording rocks (: somewhat. and it has a nice ring to it. heh. the song is just joined together very nicely. x)

anyway, i love my piano! its like in my room beside my very nice soft bed (: it makes a very sweet mellow-y sound and its really really special to me(: its like there cause i'm not gona stop just at grade 8? and its so-called mine? :D like my own possession (: and it feels great! heh.

haha i love music hahas i am living in a really really nice musical world(: cause i have snchoir, my piano; my lovely computer with music(: ; my brain that plays music :D ; to be able to sing lovely songs (: ; my radio in my room ; tchr james and my darling theory frens ; definitely not forgetting wy the piano expert ; darling ann jie! who i spent singing during p5 and p6 ; cam koh darling who sings somewhere out there with me when we feel like it (: and a lot of other things and people who contributes to this lovely musical world of mine (:

and i am one lucky girl(:

gnia

eugenia is BORED. and er. have a lot of undone hw. silly tests ):
oh well.
just came online for fun. still have like er
geog notes to make
trial exam ):
argumentative essay (for my group hurrs)
maths trigo (sigh!)

everything is so screwed.
XP
oh never mind i shall be a good girl and go off like,
now.

gnia

HAHA i think eminem's cd's kinda cute! er. in a sense, yes. in another sense, no.
XD oh well. glad you like it anyway ALVIS (: haha glad i bought it too. at least, its not wasted. like 2 cds 4 sing bucks haha worth it worth it.

school is as BORING as usual; screw SS. dont really care, and dont want to give a damn. i know i should NEVER be having such an attitude towards studies but sigh you think i want this to happen? if schoolwork returned to how innocently appealing like the time during primary school when there SEEMED to be a meaning to studying, then at least, it would be a million times better, but NO. its not like that. as if i want to care about trigo right? or circular measures. whatever. physics, boring. maths, retarded. geog, alright BUT its sadly hard to score. chinese, alright. pw with her, silly. end of school, yay. i love choir.

stoned the afternoon away. spent tonight on the phone. 2mr morning probably half asleep. 2mr afternoon doing theory. 2mr night screaming how i wasted friday and saturday.

shucks.

oh well. my uncle (i think) is in hospital ): he's suspected to have stroke or something SIGH hope he's gona be fine

was thinking how much my life rocks in certain aspects like such a lovely piano teacher i have, to be part of such a great choir darling SNCHOIR(:, to have such great piano frens, choir frens, darling ann jie (:, to have someone who's nearly always only a phone call away haha to rant at almost every other day -grins-, to have such a great family (somewhat), a really great choir comm and every little thing that i nva say or left out lah. you all dont know how much all this means to me yeah? maybe it doesnt seem like a lot to you all, but yeah i am still very grateful to all of you (:

i am feeling so loved (: and happy (:
for now.

gnia

maybe i screwed aural. probably i screwed aural. sigh. maybe, i screwed almost everything; besides pieces. a bit worried about it. but there's a month to wait so.. i guess.. i'll be waiting yeah.

hate maths. hate maths. hate maths. hate maths. hate maths.

sleepy. really, sleepy.

choir was alright LOU ROCKS : D hehehe she's playing the accompaniment (: yay!
sop ones! aiyoh. today, was like kinda crappy hurr went sharper and sharper then ms lim wasnt very pleased with us lah): she kept looking at me ): must JIAYOH k sop ones need to put in more EFFORT and please please listen and follow what i say ok? dont let ms lim look down on US. no matter what you're doing, sectionals, combines, or warmups. just put in effort. must TRY. dont just sing, because i say sing. only when you try, and put in effort, then we can improve, right? especially sec ones and twos. syf 2007 is really really crucial right you know it, you know what all us seniors want you all to get for syf 2007 right? i know, its still like, two more years, but it will really really be gone soon yeah so must work hard starting from now ok? there's seriously not much point to only put in effort when ms lim's standing in front, being too dependent isnt good. must show ms lim that we still can go on if she's away right? dont let ms lim worry too much about us and anyway; cant let our seniors down, can we?

yah i can go ranting on and on but never mind not that any sop ones reads this anyway this is just me talking to myself yeah. maybe i'm not even making any sense.

i love hershey chocs + nuts about raisin icecream + cold stuff
dont you just simply adore hershey chocs which rock (:

SS test 2mr dont really wna care oh wells ):

gnia

tired, sleepy. but not really excited. just peaceful, calm. at the moment.
i am really really glad i went choir today. made me happy. and at least, i wont be worrying too much about the choir on thursday (:
my arm hurt ): oh well.
a bit headache. gona slp. PRAY SCALES GO FINE!

gnia

http://www.ladyrebecca.com/quiz/images/friend.jpg">	Friend Bear are everyone's ideal friend because you are sincere and genuinely kind. Sometimes you worry about your friends' problems so much, you forget about your own responsibilities, which can get you into trouble. For you, it's the little things that really count. You also happen to be the main driver of the Cloud Car. No speeding!
Take the Which Care Bear Are You? Quiz!

haha. TODAY. i just realised how nice it is to sms others during FORBIDDENED times ! : D -grins at wy- its like uhh. very ci4 ji1 like doing something dangerous but not get caught or discovered. HAHA. its so fun ><>

uhhs. got back that sci competition thingy. missed distinction by the most two marks HUH ): so its me and my credit again.

anyway. chem test on wed; geog graded assignment due on thurs; ss test on friday. piano exam's in TWO DARNED DAYS ): i hope to pass HAPPY. er. yes, happy. THEN I HAVE NO NEED TO TOUCH SCALES ANYMORE HOORAY! XDD i love pieces ><>

and i am really really kinda glad i'm gona continue piano after grade 8 (:

cheryllee thanks for tagging! :D love you lots, miss you loads (: study hard for your end of years ok? -hugss-

going off for piano really soon. mom's calling me to change; bye!

gnia

i am feeling so totally sianified ): i dont feel like doing hw (damnit endless trial exams) making notes studying for the million tests coming up ESP CHEM which so conveniently falls on the same day as my piano exam. and sniffing like crazy does NOT improve the situation.
i am like so so so worried about piano my scales totally suck and sigh i feel so screwed. i feel so tired. i need SLEEP. and i need CLEAN AIR to breathe so i wont be sneezing so badly
anyway.
i wna go overseas next year with SNCHOIR!!!! CZECH REPUBLIC! WITH ANDERSON!! i wna go. can i? no conditions? (like what; all A2s for end of years wth) i know people DO get such marks, but perhaps i am not aiming for that. yet.
anyway, all of a sudden, its raining. hm.
and its another one of those weekends that are too short for anyone's good and i feel that i've accomplished nothing.
oh YES; i LOVE hershley chocs!
and i am off to practice piano.

gnia

yesterday.
farewell's like finally over; phew! a bit , but quite relieved lah x) no more worrying about it!
well... farewell went fine(: i mean, quite smoothly. was worrying a lot about the food.. and our performance.. scared that we'll screw up and stuff.. at least, we pulled through(: yeah, really hope that what we put up brought back those memories we shared together since we entered snchoir.. and these memories will be with all of you. always(:

love you loads sec fours! -hugs-

yesteryesterday
choir went quite fine i guess. could be better; could be worse.

today
piano; SIGH. tchr james keeps on saying that my A and B pieces are rushed. lack colour. shading. missing notes. bad starts and ends. messy parts. plus plus plus. then my scales are so screwed. so screwed. screw scales! sigh. tchr james say if you fail scales you'll probably have trouble passing ): wth. i am like freaking out a lot a lot a lot. its like, damn! piano's in FOUR DAYS ): sigh i am like so worried. then there's chem test on that day ): i seriously dont think i can study on tuesday night. cause i would be like freaking out already. then on wednesday i'll fail chem huh. like; yay.

i am feeling very sleepy. and tired. but ive hardly done anything and its so late already. and i just spent half an hour signing my sis up for the abrsm theory exam via internet. screw it; waste my time, then still blame me cause you cant bloody hell print the damned receipt. oh, its like all my fault. rightt.

not that i feel like doing anything anyway. i am feeling very tired. and worried. shucks.

gnia

JUST FINISHED SS GRADED ASSIGNMENT HAHA THANKS TO WY WHO LENT/GAVE ME HIS SS WORKBOOK B HAHAS and this made eugenia a really really happy, soul : D wy like saved my life; totally XDD

i shall start from the very beginning

woke up at 8+ today. hahas. erm, did like practically nothing i guess. well, then went to test at the magicfiddler place. since this is a public place, i shant comment but just state facts. we went there at 10:50 , as the timing was at 11. to find that it wasnt open. and we were stuck outside till 11:10 then we could go in. it was a bohemian piano; too hard for an exam piano, i thought. i mean, will have a lot of missing notes and stuff, and exams arent really the most calmest situations on earth so i'll be like scared like dont know what and i'll probably be playing not as hard as usual and i'll rush lah. but on a hard piano i'll still rush, but be unable to play properly. therefore its ): and i am a tinge scared.

then. piano tuner scheduled at 1pm. BUT he came late (as predicted by wy HAHA) yes, he's mr koh if im not mistakened and he tunes tchr james' pianos too haha. he's quite friendly lah.

wy came at 230+ hahas and i can say that my piano is still quite intact (HAHAS) and erm probably rather well seasoned XD anyway yes; wy's still very very good at piano and his astounding long fingers (hurmph) are like very very... long? XD then my fingers are so short sigh anyway yes he was like playing a lot a lot of different pieces yeah some were nice lah I LIKE FANTASY IMPROMPTU HAHA IT IS LIKE VERY, VERY NICE :D and whoa the way he plays it is like WOOSH XD fantastic sia. damn loud and darn nice(:

he thinks my pieces are good (somewhat) haha thanks ok! :D i have like more confidence or something even though my standard's dropping quite quickly im like SOMEWHAT going back to my 'peak' or something. yay. i hope this continues(:

seriously, i really enjoyed wy's visit today :D a lot. it was really really an 'eye-opener' in a lot of aspects lah. like practiced scales and aural (KINDA) which is quite -thumbs up- yeah it is hard to come by aural practices yeah? more practice, more confidence. (:

yes; even though had to rush work after wy left at 9, i think it was worth it (: wy must come again some time alright? yah managed to finish SS GRADED ASSIGNMENT TOO : D
maybe i missed out some stuff but i am in a hurry to leave as alvis needs to use the computer.
yeahh..
a bit worried for farewell..
ms lim coming 2mr.. ): a bit worried. CAN WE MAKE IT?

gnia

I BROUGHT HOME THE WRONG SS WORKBOOK HOME AND THERE'S THIS GRADED ASSIGNMENT DUE ON THURSDAY
darn darn darn.

shucks piano lesson was like all bad ): was darn sleepy and stuff then yah played like crap SIGH my piano's like going to the dogs or something my fingers cant play for nuts already. broke down twice just now lah. all the more its in an environment that i'm quite used to.. so i shouldnt be breaking down or something. then couldnt remember the bass melody; for both lah! then.. i'm still mixing up iib and IV. section C was fine; guessed and somehow knew both so yah it was fine. section D.. half right half wrong lor...

wasted the rest of the morning in tchr james house half sleeping cause mom was talking in the room with tchr alice, then we went for lunch at like 10am but we reached there like 1020 then waited for so long so it was like 1040 when the food came. haha; lunch even eariler than recess! XDD

anyway ; happy national day everyone! patriotic me is wearing a red shirt hahas
shucks ive like wasted the afternoon sleeping somehow
2mr's a busy day cause im going to the magic fiddle place to test the piano
then the tuner's coming at 1pm 2mr to tune the piano (duh)
then wy's coming to my house to destroy the newly tuned piano; haha

i still have undone maths hw; TRIGO and something else.. which i forgot :(
rarh.

g-nia

come on; tell me that i am one bad bad girl. cause i love my earphones A LOT A LOT A LOT.
i hate it when ANYONE especially that SOMEONE attempts to sing, whistle or do ANYTHING that will distract me and that will refrain me from enjoying the music properly. yes; when i listen to music, i make it a POINT to be in the best environment where i can really LISTEN and immerse myself into the music. in school, if i borrow a side of earphones, im not so picky. but at home.. its a different story.
just imagine; to listen to songs in the comfort of your own home. you are trying to feel the music, and immerse yourself into the singer's emotions, when suddenly you hear someone trying to sing yet not know the words; or someone trying to whistle but failing miserably. ok yah maybe some people may think that this is ok, but sorry; i am not you, and i find this darn irritating.
that, is where the earphones come in. ok; they are not the best earphones; using it for a long while like half an hour makes my ears hurt every so slightly (cause the edges are not rubberised). but at least, i can hear the music without having anyone to interupt me. :D i love my earphones(:

i love my aunty daiyun a lot a lot aunty daiyun you must take care alrightys?
ann jie i know you're going through a lot i cant really be with you but i'll always be here ok? miss you a lot.. -hugs- be strong!

yes; finally we came together today after national day celebrations and practiced. i guess, we were alright; like we sounded much much louder than what we sound during choir or something. it was pretty informal; yet we finished everything within 2 hours. besides one or two songs, we're pretty much all right. gona check out how long it takes later. i think we ROCK A LOT :D:D:D even though all this is very very last minute but i know we can pull through :D and i THINK it's gona go fine; i believe that screwing this up is NOT an option (:

yeah so what if we sound like there are no chords and wrong dynamics i think its the enthusiam that counts the most :D but surely; we must be heard lah. which shouldnt be a problem. yes. i shouldnt disclose anymore of what we're doing SHHH ITS A SECRET (:
-grins-

YES :D we ROCK. like; totally

gnia

random thoughts..

[the world is in a mess. its heading in the wrong direction; the precise reason why there are so many arising problems in the society at the moment. more young people are unable to face up to the real world, and more teens are depressed, rebellious and blah blah blah. Music is very popular among teens now, and all the content in the pop songs are mostly about love, anguish, depression, and a lot of other themes. ok, the songs may sound nice, but can you imagine what sort of influence they have on people like us? imagine; listening to songs when you're depressed, and hearing a song on a depressed soul or a song with anguish; what sort of effect will it have on the listener? its like showing what situation you're in and yet, there's no answer given to you. it shows you how trapped you are, how blind you are, and that you're trapped in a vortex of problems, and you cant get out. it makes you feel that you're useless. and makes you blame the world. this makes you sink deeper and deeper into depression. and usually when you listen to such a song, it continues playing in your head even IF you manage to turn off the music. yes, i'll leave you to imagine about what happens after that.]

this is a really nice song. BUT its depressing i guess. you'll understand if you listen to it.

Untitled -Simple Plan
I open my eyes
I try to see but I’m blinded by the white light
I can’t remember how
I can’t remember why
I’m lying here tonight

And I can’t stand the pain
And I can’t make it go away
No I can’t stand the pain

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

Everybody’s screaming
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I’m slipping off the edge
I’m hanging by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can’t explain what happened
And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done
No I can’t

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

yes. see? i am like such an idiot. im like getting addicted to this song.
you dont know how bad the feeling of being pulled out of dream world into reality is.

[efficiency is NOT everything. ]

aiyah. busy now. ann jie must hold on kay? gnia mei loves you(: BE STRONG (:

gnia

just some random thoughts lah.

[there's no rulebook that tells you what path leads to success. Not everything works out for everyone, so i guess.. one doesnt succeed just by reading how other people succeed, but by trying and testing out what way will eventually allow them to succeed. what im trying to say is that, everyone has a chance to succeed, you just have to find a way, a way that's suitable for you. it's not just following the footsteps of other successful people. it is about creating your own success. in whatever sort of situation you're in, there is a way leading out of all this. you just have to try out what works for you, cause when you succeed, people will be trying to find out how you succeeded, and the way you succeeded may be something completely unconventional or something. miracles DO happen. you just have to believe that they exist.]

oh well. feeling a bit random. like, stony. but usually stony silence is somehow sad. which leads to sadness and whatever. im just kinda sleepy, what i've been feeling nowadays.

there's a lot of things to do, but i dont feel like doing anything.
i know time is running out, but i'm still doing nothing.

shucks. my piano exam is like getting nearer. then i still cant play properly. my fingers went crazy since after the internal exam lah, screw it. and this exam is like SO SO crucial if i fail or get like rubbish marks like grade 7 i'll probably like go nuts or something. if only we were awarded marks by how much we enjoy the song under unstressful conditions. or something.

gnia

its a friday.. (: i am sleepy.
shucks. im kinda worried for piano can. my pieces are getting worse by the day, a lot of mistakes, missed notes, and everything's like going haywire. it just doesnt sound right, and i just dont have the mood to play. its just.. all wrong. and its in like 12 days? sigh. and my scales are screwed. kinda.

aiyah. there's just a lot of stuff going in my head or something. its like swirling and swirling and swirling. i need MUSIC. thats why i just put the cd into the disk drive. sigh. i dont know lah. im just in this very dont know what state, and i feel that im just searching for something; but i dont know what that something is. i also dont know what i want, peace and quiet, or time to think through all this, or maybe even just someone to confide in, someone to understand what is going on, or just to have the comfort in know that, perhaps someone knows what all this is.

its just, all wrong. i dont know. no one knows; in school, im just not like this. its only when im at home or something. i dont know. its just, weird or something. i dont know. its like having the feeling that, everything's just a dream; nothing's real for certain. and, its just really really wrong? its like, im potraying a completely different person when im at home or something. but i swear; whatever i do in school and outside, whenever i hang out with friends and stuff, whatever i do isnt fake, everything i do is like, natural. yet.. i dont know. at home.. its just.. weird. and it sucks even more when you feel that not one understands and you're like the only one who's going through all this..

anyway. did i tell you that i HATE people who hang around when i use the computer? its extremely IRRITATING. someone's STILL away. SIGH :(

gnia

feeling a bit sian now. just a bit depressed. a lot of reasons lah. like example someone is shouting in the room? which is very irritating lah. i just think she is damn stupid. like. you be stupid and dont do what you're supposed to do, and until she starts shouting then you keep saying sorry sorry and whatever then get scolded then you still have to do what you have to do. its just really really retarded cause this doesnt happen once a week; but like nearly everyday?! precisely; the point.

very sleepy now; dont know why. then a bit worried lah. about certain stuff. i mean yah... oh well.

im going off. bye.

gnia

i feel REALLY REALLY HAPPY its like the end of TESTS for this week and i feel SO FREE! its like HAHA this rocks : D the feeling of being FREE.

darn; chem test was so darn simple wth i dont know why I GOT ONE MCQ WRONG darnit THAT WAS SO DUMB; i could have like scored full marks or something if i get 18/20 i'll look at my mistake and scream until the school building collapses. -rumbles- anyway. im sure like a lot of people will score like, full marks?

***

PHYSICS! i DO NOT know what on EARTH happened A BIT 20.5/40 LAH THAT IS LIKE SO LOSER darnit )))): mrgan marked more leniently but his leninency did not come to ME! cause i did all that you went leninent on ): im like very VERY nice i put in all the directions which are like 1mrk and you decide to NOT consider the direction! )))))): and WHAT ON EARTH WAS I DOING THAT DAY a bit see qn wrongly lah! ): so i just got that 20.5/40 when people can add like up to FIVE WHOLESOME MARKS. I AM SAD )))))))))))): and its all YOUR fault hmph.

yeah feeling tired.. ><>

gnia

# posted by Eugenia @ 5:52 PM