ItS MeEeEe!

whoosh! what a paper.
had a lazy afternoon...
lunch w apr and mich at thai express..
and bought chewy junior home for those at home to tryy.
and now.. just feeling sleepy.
wish i could sleep better on nights before papers..

time check:
12:30am
1:08am
...
4:59am

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i guess.. it being over is a relief.
econs and marketing, here we go...!

gnia

i like real people.

and when i think about it,
you, are the person that truely fits into this criteria.
meaning everything you say,
and going to great lengths without thinking about yourself.
being true to everyone.



that's why, despite everything..
things are still like it should be and i know you haven't changed.

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i hope i'm living up to the way i wish things are.

and regards to stats.. i'll just do my best. (: yep.

gnia

God likes to place many reminders in life, to lead us back to Him, to remind us, that what we think, or the things happening around us, aren't that great after all..

and in the end, those things may not even matter. while we get caught up in it for nothing.

-----

i've gotten over OB.
i'm panicking for stats and the rest.

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teach me how to do more, complain less, and look up to You more.
for those walking in this journey of faith, thank you for being there; to serve as reminders to each one of us when sometimes we are blinded by things around us.

God always has a plan.

so, just keep faith and believe.

gnia

apart from hyperventilating..

thank you, for coming down to support and be with me the past 2 days.
i really appreciate it.

i'll never regret, not stopping to trust, not stopping to believe.
there are some things that i hold fast to,
and this, is it.

after exams.. let's do something new.
(:

for now.. i'll just focus and try harder.

but thank you, for believing too.
gnia

finally all over.
slept at 810 till 910am.
got off my chair with a shock that the sky was bright again.

the same way how the sky got dark without me noticing just 12 hours prior to that.

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i'll take a short nap.
and off we go!

gnia

exams are right around the corner, and i'm rushing out my marketing report,which is currently about. less than 2 page strong. (inclusive of a damn big diagram)

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we were talking at 10 minutes to 3, where ideas were running dry and language turning incoherent. and dear asked me,

"will things turn for the better next time?"

sometimes, i think of uni, i'm rather torn.
the desire not to screw up exams. the desire not to disappoint.
yet, the want to relax, to break out and just enjoy.

long gone were the days i slept at 12. or even 1. (or actually, 2)
and yet, i'm waking at 7, 8 plus everyday.
ya.. of course, it's always a matter of choice.
i can choose not to wake up and just sleep as much as i want.

but sometimes, the circumstances just do not support such an action.
or maybe, i have been shaped into this mindset which stops myself from doing so.

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to my dear wy,
i have no answer to your question.
sometimes i look at the way you slog your guts out and how you cope with everything.
yet do so well.

and yes, do know, although now we're both studying for uni,
deep down, i know things won't change much for you, even when uni comes to a closure.
if studies are already demanding so much from you,
i would say, how much more would work demand, especially for you.

-----

chatted with mama one night.
some things.. just need to be ironed out.
wonder, what it would be like, to just let myself go completely.
have no consequences for what i do.
no opportunity cost for time.

yes, things that have happened does make me think.
but sometimes i wonder why i find excuses, to make myself feel better, or worse.
just to salvage what has been left stagnant.

i look at other people,
and i feel so different.
but then again, there are no fixed rules in this game;
it is the prevailing of one's differences to accept each other

i know, i value understanding.
i believe in making things last.
i hate, to misjudge.
i know, that failure to encompass, can lead to bigger problems.

but, when things just get too much..
sometimes, i ask myself why i do all this.

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i can't wait for exams to end.
i want to do what i want to do, without the guilt that i'm neglecting something else.
and spend the time, with..

the guy who lives on liquid sleep.

gnia

i came here because i had the sudden pang of fear.

inability to finish studying for quiz.
inability to prepare for presentation.
inability to finish my report.

and add that to some emotional instability.
coupled with the fact that my weekend is drawing to a very very fast close.

-----

when you feel the fear clawing at your chest, trying to come out..

-----

one step at a time.

gnia

happy easter!

today, during cell, we were talking about PURPOSE, in life. like all of us strive towards sth.. and while we were discussing how a fellow friend (who aspires to marry a doctor) on how she should be achieving her purpose..

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marketing really applies, everywhere, even in places you can't imagine.

there is a doctor working in this certain polyclinic.
his queue are the longest, on the days which he work on.
and MANY, many of these people, are army boys.

because he asks... "how many days do you want?"

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STP model
segmenting the market - ppl who see the doctor. medical reasons, MC, special needs, routine.
targeting - ppl who want to chao keng.
positioning - MC dispenser.
.
.
.

haha. food for thought.

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we discussed about eternal life. and this question popped up (again): why must we live forever? why seek eternal life?
reminded me of the analogy of the never ending video game..

hm.. my two pence on this..

cause if there isnt one.. then our actions today will be for naught..

and also..
perhaps it's not so much of a video game.
since no one knows what eternal life will be like.. what makes us think it's just like how things are, on Earth? maybe things follow a different law.. new spectrums of reasoning.. ways of doing things..

where we aren't bound by Earth anymore.
when Jesus resurrected, things that defy logic happen.
just because.
and this is on Earth, still.

so, why should eternal life be bound by Earthly norms?

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reflections, reflections.

p.s. wonderful time spent with dear, and party at ann's place.. (:

gnia

# posted by Eugenia @ 11:17 PM

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why why why,
do i feel like a total _____, at the end of the day.
the sentence, so near yet so far, come to my mind?
my heart want to speak, yet my mouth does not.

you know, i feel so torn now.

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it's times like these, when i just stop short of saying what i want to say..
i really hate myself.

lunch with marketing groupmates. (:


finished the book i'd started last week.
keeping faith, by jodi picoult.
a timely read.. seeing that it's good friday tmr.


it was.. an intriguing story, although the ending was quite expected, even with what i suppose was meant to be a twist.
i guess, it was the only way to worm out from making this a story one on religion.


not that it doesnt raise several questions.
it always intrigues me to think what God would think about these fiction stories that talks about religion, or bring in theories and postulations.
a similar "type" of book would be the wish list by eoin colfer.


to quote my dear brother, "I wonder if they will be judged with blasphemy on Judgement Day."
hahaha. something to think about.


but i guess, it spikes the imagination to think of the unknown.
and in my opinion, i would say.. i don't know what would happen
but i would leave it all in God's hands cause He's had it all planned.


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lunch was indeed enjoyable. @michelle: looks like our "matching" may really fall into place, haha.


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on the surface, we may all seem like happy and confident people.
but deep down inside, we all know that it's a mask we hide behind.


when you put a group of strangers together, and they know that they're going to be with each other for the next 3 years,


you wonder what people will think of you.
and you hope that you will be accepted by them.
i have always wondered, since young. why are some people popular?

is it the ability to fit into what people want you to be, like being able to blend in with societal norms?
and the best fit wins?
but now, i know different.

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many things have happened after JC. i would say.. both big and small.
i've met many people, and everyone has their own story.
these people come from a greater array of backgrounds, and i must say, not all as smooth sailing as mine.


i've picked up many things, thought through some impertinent thoughts and despite all that's happening next week,

i thank God for everything i've been blessed with. (:
for the people, who keep inspiring me to go on.
the troubles, that makes me stronger.
for keeping my family safe.

This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it!

gnia(: